Tag: dark

thermophile

OshanLeave a comment

I wish I could say

that when he left the pieces of him tied strings around me

and I had to cut them one by one

until I could stand on my own

I really wish I could say

that he burned me down

and I had to bloom from the ashes like a finger tattooed Phoenix

but I threw the zippo

into his tall straw body

and I laid the gasoline

because

I am a Thermophile

I think he should be too

because

water is boring

until you are denied it

then a drop feels like drinking straight from the hose

in the middle of a heatwave

love does not have to be comfortable

it can be a forest fire

when you really love something

do not let it go

set it on fire

and let it rebuild itself stronger

instant

OshanLeave a comment

feasting on the wind

only to attempt preservation and

picture what it would be like

to be preserved

we are choking on the

intangible

picture that

with frothed spit cascading from my chin

I try to swallow

they won’t take that from me

I hate myself

and you hate yourself

we are mutually

marbled and cool to the touch

Mercy

OshanLeave a comment

I wont gag

when pus fills my mouth

or when they scream

about it

I won’t do it

and

I won’t drool

at all

no saliva will meet the floor

or saturate the sheets

on my feet

I won’t do it

and

I can get through it

needles hooking skin

sinking in

I won’t do it

I’ll get through this

eyecontact

OshanLeave a comment

her face felt like silk

on the real housewives of slab city

carrying a mouth full of dimes

in a plastic bag

and a blocked airway

her face felt like ecstasy

a handful of mouth dripping

grey wool suits counting

posters falling off the wall

when the clock strikes midnight

her face gave me energy

choking

mouth swollen

arms woollen

perfect timing

tamdamn

OshanLeave a comment

The sandstone edge beneath my feet is floury dust,

that’s craving only water.

I tighten the weak muscles in my core,

hoping to stay strong and

hoping I lose my footing.

 

In the summer it was firm.

The sun ran through my blonde hair,

and past the curves in my skin.

My shoulders were soft and I dressed in carnation,

billowing and light.

A hot breeze caught beneath my wing,

and placed my toes centred on the lip.

 

It’s getting cold now and,

the leaves are turning.

They slice back and forth as they fall off the trees,

the wind urging their ears.

Forcing them into sticky black corners

where they will fade to brown and begin rotting.

The precipitation threatens paralyzation.

 

Heavy clouds will fire off ice bullets,

forcing the earth to dance.

sucker

OshanLeave a comment

be madly in love with someone who drives you crazy

latenightscoveredinblood

graspingatthetoiletcrying

 not knowing what to do

the kind of crazy that just has to be accepted

ifyouleaveme

i’lldoit

i’llfucking

do it 

and just has to be followed

endlessly

handcuffed

until it’s just you two of you left

shelostthefuckingkeys

forever

 

feast

OshanLeave a comment

her heart wasn’t steady

a ship in a storm

your constant tugging of doubt

porcelain in versace heels

shining and talking politely

medication and daddy issues

is this what could have been?

 

dress never wrinkled

reasonably educated

a muse for your artistic endeavours

manic

pixie

dream

girl

 

shes falling and

grasping on bodies and trying to get back up

tripping and slipping and

holding onto the warmth of blood to blood

 

spaced out

close to death

close to pain

raw throat

wishing she could go back to those times

slamming on the cement

in the bathroom you are trying to stop her

knuckles bruised

bleeding and blacking out and bleeding

not back there

she cannot go back there

you wont have it

 

matters are tough

and feelings  are sharp

shallow pangs

you feel nothing

she is rotting

flies on the meat

swirling and feasting

 

 

 

My Neck, mY bacK

OshanLeave a comment

And without a word they touched their bare bellies together,

Making slurping sounds.

Anna, with a drink in her hand said,

“It just made sense”.

“It just did” she repeated.

A ritual? A greeting?

Who knows.

American

OshanLeave a comment

I cut your manicured lawn,

And fuck your mom.

I’m a suburban serial killer,

Empty and looking for filler.

 

I am perpetual depression,

And major in constant aggression.

I am obsessed,

At best.

 

I clean your shiny pool,

And play you like a fool.

A glimmer in my eye,

Watching your family die.

 

I make minimum wage,

Get high off rage.

Trophy wives,

Wasted lives.

 

I vacuum the pastel rug,

And sell your son drugs.

He can be just like me,

Trapped in suburbia eternity.